what time is it?

good LORD! it's October, already! i swear i was 25, just yesterday... quoting Sex in the City "f*ck i'm old!" and now, i'm only days away from my 28th birthday... **insert song and dance** thankfully, 40 (or 50) is the new 30, so i've got loads of time to live. i used to think i'd die young - hoped i was special enough for God to take me early. **insert smack to the head** i was at a funeral on Saturday and the mourning family was content... their son lived his life fully... heeding his motto "Carpe Diem". when he died there were no regrets - save not wanting him dead. my friend pointed how uncommon this is. we all hope to say the same... throughout the service i was pondering the self-absorbed notion of what my funeral would be like. this family, in particular, was Irish and in true fashion celebrated his LIFE. i'd like that... for my life to be an example. asking my family what they would say are my best and worst traits... i fully anticipated what my "worst" traits were - *ahem*. however, i was taken aback by what was considered my best. i have spent so long trying to fix myself... it brought tears to my eyes that my perception of another's view of me could be so harsh. love is described as many things - all pervasive and Strong. how could i doubt its goodness, as well. i'm taking away from this life thing something good. and it's time i focused on it, too!