Nerd / Stud

a moment of "sharing" has revolutionized my outlook on relationships - friends, lovers, whatever! my attempts are akin to building a jigsaw puzzle - border first. i throw out the easy stuff, first... divorce, children, death and "would you still love me if i became a paraplegic?". for preparing men for marriage i score HIGH... but not any fruits i can enjoy - they marry (soon) after we break up. in years past this could have spurned an embittered rant... but not now. married people consistently share their "wish" to be single. *contented sigh* besides raising a few eyebrows and sounding "interior" alarms (run away, run away...) my intense and gruelling approach to love has been a one- sided attempt to avoid pain. how ridiculous and familiar i must seem. in gentleness and kindness, a dear friend explained the need to start by building a corner - creating a picture... not resembling a jigsaw puzzle of borders and such, at all! this mini portrait may only ever be a sketch or small snapshot. hopefully, it was an enjoyable experience. in moving on i can decide to replicate the illustration or create something wholly different or retain elements... whatever! God was Creator first and has consistently revealed Himself as Love. how much MORE in life-long relationships should this be exemplified (and worked at)?!! This makes me wonder about God - is he a nerd or a stud? i prefer a quality nerd, anyday... however, that would make him a stud, in my eyes. *ahem* such depth ;o)